e23 News Archive: October 2008

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October 31, 2008: Halloween? Yeah. Have A Happy One.

It only comes once a year, folks, so go out there and enjoy it. As one of the precious few costume-wearing holidays, take this celebration for all it's worth. You deserve it.

If you're going to a GURPS game, just be sure to take GURPS Creatures of the Night, Vol. 5 with you. Silly costumes, door-to-door candy extortion, and partying like mad isn't the only thing the holiday is here for. It's also here as a cheap excuse to scare the ever-loving fnord out of your players.

They probably have it coming, anyway, after that whole incident with the halfling village's water supply.

-- Fox Barrett

October 30, 2008: Attack Of The Awesome

So. Space: 1889. No, wait, that doesn't do it justice. It's really more like, "Holy fnording Bob, do you see all that Space: 1889 stuff!?" Folks, a few days some Space: 1889 PDFs were sent our way. Words I would use to describe the quantity would include "cavalcade," "avalanche," "smorgasbord," "amazing," "colossal," and "sweet mother of mercy that's a lot of books." I'm not sure that it's technically all of it, but hey . . . close enough.

The focus for this little news piece, however, is your friend and mine: the core book. Those two little words mean everything in the world of games where roles are, I am told, "played." You're welcome to buy all the new stuff, of course (in fact, go do that - there might be a promotion in it for me, and who doesn't want that?), but I think you should start here. And maybe you'll stop here, too. But you won't know until you buy the book. And besides . . . it's got steampunk airships that fly to Mars! Is it possible to even conceive of anything cooler without creating a rift in space-time?

The answer is "no." Go buy the book. Right now.

-- Fox Barrett

October 29, 2008: But Don't Take My Word For It

With a name like "The Great City," The Great City has a lot to live up to. The travel brochures don't say, "The Fairly Amicable City." This is not "The City That's A Little Too Hot In The Summer, But Otherwise A Decent Year-Round Vacation Spot." The sign out front does not state "The City (You're Welcome To Form Your Own Opinion)." It's bold. It's sassy. It says, in a no-nonsense, matter-of-fact way that it is great.

Which, of course, means they have to prove it.

Thus, The Great City: Color Map Folio. See for yourself just how great The Great City is. (Spoiler alert: It's great.)

-- Fox Barrett

October 28, 2008: Forgotten Fighters For Furious Folks

Feel frightfully forlorn for faraway fantasy fellows? Forgotten Heroes: Fang, Fist, and Song, fraught with fun and flavor, fills fractures in the fantasy firmament.

I . . . I don't think I can keep this up. Yeah, I think it's time to face the fact that, despite this mountain of hair on my head, I am not Alan Moore. So I shan't continue to try. What you need to concern yourself with is the fact that this book, as you may have gathered from the title, is about that exiled trio: the druid, the barbarian, and the bard. What you probably didn't gather is that it also has more than a few pages about monks. Yes, walking around in a 4th edition D&D dungeon with no more equipment than your pajamas isn't just for homicidal practical jokes anymore!

Man. That would be pretty funny. Excuse me a moment, I need to go make some notes for my campaign.

-- Fox Barrett

October 27, 2008: Paper Joes

The brave men found in Paper Miniatures: WWII Americans Set are ideal for pushing paper Nazis out of paper Normandy. They'll selflessly lay down their tiny paper lives in defense of paper liberty. Their paper solidarity will hold them together as the paper hell of paper World War 2 strives to pull them apart.

. . . You do have a tiny paper World War 2 going on at your house too, right?

I mean . . . it's not just me, is it?

-- Fox Barrett

October 26, 2008: Hey. Aren't We Forgetting Someone?

Bar-who? Dru-what? And what are you talking about gnomes for? They're monsters!

Okay, so the fourth edition of the world's most popular fantasy roleplaying game (I don't know why people always say that instead of just D&D, but I didn't want to rock any boats) is out there in the wild. Sure, it has dragon-people and squad-leader guys. That is great, but the one thing it doesn't have is giant, naked men with massive axes shouting and decapitating things. Yes, that's right: no bards.

But fret not. The Advanced Player's Guide is here to get that naked fury back into your games where it belongs.

-- Fox Barrett

October 25, 2008: It's October. Buy Some Dang Zombies!

Go look at a calendar. A Gregorian, you smarty-nerd. See that? Yes! October! The best month of the year! International Halloween Month! You realize what this means, right?

Right. We've got to push as much horror-themed stuff on you as our self-respect can handle. To that end, we present Cardboard Heroes: Fantasy Set 5 - Undead. Three guesses what's in it.

So there you have it. Halloween. Some spoooooky Cardboard Heroes. You know what you must do.

-- Fox Barrett

October 24, 2008: Ker-Boom! Crash! Screech! Ka-Pow!

This juvenile onomatopoeia is brought to you by GURPS Action 2: Exploits, your one-stop shop for non-stop action.

Did I lay it on a little thick there? Sorry. Book is quite good, though. Mostly, it functions as The Big Book of Streamlining GURPS for Over-the-Top Action-Adventure. When bullets are flying, motorcycles are driving across rooftops, and that cipher needs to be cracked in the next 5 minutes or you're all dead, stopping the game while you look up how what penalty applies to what roll (which may also get this or that bonus for this circumstance) is the last thing you should be doing. This is the movies, people! So just grab one of the quickie rules in here and go.

No, really. Go. There's an alien ninja cyborg from the future here to kill you, and if you don't start that bus and keep it above 50MPH, then the terrorists (who, by the way, killed your partner) will release a bio-agent into Los Angeles that'll create an army of walking dead. Go!

-- Fox Barrett

October 23, 2008: Pox Defined Fully

Players finished off every dragon in the book? They scoff at the thought of a mere 1,000-year-old lich and his army of shambling damned? Are several beholders sitting over the mantle with amusing signs that say things like "Bet he didn't see that one coming!"? In short, are your players knocking down all your challenges? There's an easy fix for that, then.

Give them the plague. I mean, that's what I'd do. See how they fight that with their precious +3 Doohickey of Whatever. You'll find all the funderful details in the succinctly (and appropriately) titled Plague.

Ah, the Black Death. Is there nothing it can't solve?

-- Fox Barrett

October 22, 2008: On Redeading The Undead

Killing something that's already dead is surprisingly satisfying. You wouldn't think it would work that way. You'd think it would be like getting a thrill from "cooking" a TV dinner in the microwave. Food's already cooked, you're simply reintroducing heat. In much the same fashion, that zombie is already dead, you're just reintroducing it to the ground.

Perhaps it's the guilt-free nature of assaulting something that is, by definition, dead. It's not like a corpse is going to say, "Ow, you've hurt my face and my feelings!" You'll probably just get their usual moaning "uuuuuuuuaaaaannnn." Which is probably zombie for "Hurry up and chop my head off, already. I haven't got all day."

Whatever it is about ending zombies, skeletons, zombie-skeletons, and all the other assorted undead uglies that we find so joyous, you'll find plenty of it in Lands of Darkness #1: The Barrow Ground. Unless they manage to get you before you get them. Oh, but hey, bonus! If that happens, then you'll be enriching some other adventure's day.

-- Fox Barrett

October 21, 2008: Turns Out You Are Cleared For That

Mystical doohickies. Alien thingamabobs. Knick-knacks of the damned. All this, and more, can be yours!

. . .You are an elite secret super-agent black op for an indeterminate government agency that reports to no one and may or may not be working with extraterrestrials, otherworldly spirits, dimensional travelers, or the all-knowing corpse of Zombie Elvis,  aren't you?

Good. Here's GURPS Classic: Warehouse 23. May the fnord be with you.

-- Fox Barrett

October 20, 2008: Free-DF!

Free things! Yaaaaaaay! I love 'em!

Today's "wooooo, free thing" is PDQ#. It's an alternative take on the PDQ System that's found under the hood of games like Ninja Burger or Monkey, Ninja, Pirate, Robot. This version is geared towards the buckling of swashes, so it's more pirate than ninja.

Mostly, though, it's free, and that's why you should check it out. Truly, there is no better reason to be found in life.

-- Fox Barrett

October 19, 2008: People Are Strange

Strange Magic actually has little to do with The Who, but my muse if failing me today, so just bear with me.

So some evil-bad is tearing up the place with his hoodoo mojo no-no. You? You've got the surprisingly enviable task of bringing the uppity little spell-slinger to Justice. How? Probably through punching him in the face. It works more often that you might think. Particularly since you're wearing red spandex (and people aren't laughing at you) so it's good odds that you could punch a hole in the side of an aircraft carrier. A hefty puncher, you.

So grab the book and hand the bad guy a righteous beatdown. Of course, you'll have to find him first. I guess that would make you "the seeker." Ah-hah! I knew I could tie it back to The Who again!

-- Fox Barrett

October 18, 2008: If I Could Game With The Animals . . .

My cats are terrible at roleplaying games. Unable to understand the idea that a miniature is representative of their character in the game, they seem convinced that they themselves should be on the map. I would explain scale to them, but they likely see themselves as four-legged colossi anyway, so I haven't bothered. 

Also, they're incapable of speech, which is troublesome, but I didn't figure would be that big a barrier to playing D&D.

So anyway, what I'm trying to say is that you should buy Cardboard Heroes: Fantasy Set 4 - Animals. Because it has cats in it. Cats that are actually fairly agreeable for a change.

-- Fox Barrett

October 17, 2008: Munchkin Rules

Munchkin Tournament Rules, that is.

Munchkin says it's designed for three to six players. But do you do if you've got 28 friends over who all want to play Munchkin? Sure, you could mix together sets until you have enough cards to go around. Some people enjoy destroying themselves like that. We certainly won't stop you.

We also won't take responsibility for the beating you may receive from your friends for proposing such a brilliant idea when the Munchkin Tournament Rules are available as an alternative. So download the rules today. They don't cost a dime, and they may just save you life.

-- Fox Barrett

October 16, 2008: Now, What Did We Need Again?

More butter? No, we just got a churn last week . . .

More poodles? No, the anaconda still has a full tank . . .

Ah! Now I remember! More Bad Guys!

-- Fox Barrett

October 15, 2008: Dirty, Corrupt, Crime-Ridden. Perfect.

You don't go to a place like Bedlam City because you want to "take in the local color." The "local color" will shoot your parents in the face - right in the face - while you watch. And then laugh at you.

You go there because you're a grim, square-jawed vigilante with a stogie in one hand and baseball bat in the other. You go there because all the punks and the dirtbags need a good beating. You go there because it's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

You might also go there because, frankly, you're psychotic. But hey, at least you'll have a good time!

-- Fox Barrett

October 14, 2008: Tiny, But An Onslaught Nonetheless

The rolling juggernaut of Mini-Games continues!

This time around? First is another set for Net Warriors, appropriately titled Net Warriors, Set 2, Mini-Game #73. Turn on, jack in, smash your friends and enemies into tiny, tiny digital bits. The second offering stars a new line. Zero-G, Set 1, Mini-Game #74 runs on the familiar Steel and Glory system, this time adding a flavor packet marked "space marines vs bug-alien thingies."

Where shall this unstoppable onslaught of gamery take us next? No one can saaaaay . . . except, I guess, Bad Baby. But besides them: no one can saaaaaaay . . .

-- Fox Barrett

October 13, 2008: Ooo, A Comet! Wait . . . Uh Oh.

When you've got a game called something like End of Days, you know it ain't gonna be pretty. And you'd be right. Lemme break it down for ya, folks:

It's the 60s and a big honkin' space rock has decided that Earth would be a really swell thing to help it illustrate Newton's first law of motion. The inhabitants of said sphereoid are, unsurpisingly, in a bit of a panic. The nations of the world are taking the only rational course of action: get into space as fast as possible while simultaneously trying to undermine the efforts of enemy nations. Because, obviously, space isn't big enough for us and the ruskies. Obviously.

So load up those rockets, people. I'm sure, once we get to Mars, we won't have to worry about any of this silly cold war stuff. (Bonus! If you find you're enjoying this game so much that your tongue has drilled a hole through your cheek, it might please you to hear that there's already an expansion out for this game. Also: ew, do something about that cheek.)

-- Fox Barrett

October 12, 2008: Yay, Halloween!

Halloween is, without a doubt, the greatest holiday this spinning ball of water and rock has to offer. It's the only time of year when it's socially acceptable to walk around outdoors in a suit shaped like a sandwich and not get in trouble. (Fun fact: you can do that indoors year round.) It's just a shame that we limit such festivities to only one day out of 365. I think every holiday should be a costume holiday! Think of it! Every month there'd be one day where the streets would fill with people in sandwich suits! Just a little dream of mine.

In the meantime, we'll make do with just October. Here to help us celebrate is Misfits & Menaces: Tricks & Treats. It's a particularly Halloweeny book of villains for M&M Superlink. What's more appropriate for the holiday than a book of horrible monsters and people in costume?

Woah, wait a second. Supervillains get to wear costumes year round . . . every single day. Hrmmm . . . I'll be right back. Need to find a dangerous, but poorly guarded chemical plant . . .

-- Fox Barrett

October 11, 2008: +2 Wet Blanket

Oh, sure, it seems like real fun to go slay the sea dragon. At first. Until you get knocked overboard and suddenly realize you're wearing enough iron to build the Eiffel Tower. Of course, it's possible you're not wearing any armor because the sea water has long since turned it all into a +1 Pile of Red Paperweights. Provided you made your saving throws to keep from getting scurvy, first.

But hey! Don't let me stop you from diving headfirst into Dungeon Crawl Classics #55: Isle of the Sea Drake. I'm sure you'll have a grand time dealing with pirates and zombies and all that . . . Wait, is that gold?

. . . Hang on, I'll get my sword.

-- Fox Barrett

October 10, 2008: Who Loves Ya, Baby?

Sure, it may seem like we never listen to you guys. It may appear that we collect all your questions, complaints, and suggestions into a little box that we sit around and laugh at. It might look like we are somehow collecting paychecks by tormenting all our fans, whom we loathe with a passion so radiant that it could blind God.

But, believe it or not, we really are trying to get you want you want. That book pictured over there on the right, for example. Yeah, it took us a little while (for generous uses of the word "little"), but the Ogre Miniatures rules are back. And if you've already got a copy and just want all the changes we made for the PDF, you can get that over here at the Ogre Miniatures Update. For free.

See? We do like you! C'mon, Group Hug!

-- Fox Barrett

October 9, 2008: One Good Product Deserves Another

So that adventure I mentioned yesterday? Turns out there's a few maps in there you might want. But why buy a whole darn adventure when the only thing you're interested in are the neat maps?

"Why indeed," says 0one Games. "Here, take this instead. It's 0one's Blueprints: The Great City, A Pound of Building. Therein shall you find all maps from the aforementioned adventure, as well as the ability to manipulate the maps with our wontubulous Rule the Dungeon feature."

Yes, they really said that. Really. They also said that Claudius was sleeping with my mother and that I need to get to stabbin'. And then something about the Circle of Life. Actually . . . it's all kinda blurry. Maybe I should stop taking candy from strangers.

-- Fox Barrett

October 8, 2008: Eeeeeeew . . .

What would possess someone to write something called Urban Adventures: A Pound of Flesh? Icky! Just a solid pound of unspecified meat from . . . something? What the heck kind of crazy adventures are they running in the cities? I thought adventures were supposed to be about looking for bundles of shiny wool or mystical Jesus cups or cities that someone knocked into the ocean and then everyone forgot all about. I mean, how do you even fence something like this?

Wait a moment, I'm being told . . . Oh . . . I, ah . . . apparently it's a, um . . . It's got something to do with Shakespeare.

Oh. Heh. Ahem. Nevermind.

-- Fox Barrett

October 7, 2008: You Ever Wonder What Their Insurance Premiums Are Like?

So I'm looking at Dungeon Crawl Classics #53: Forges of the Mountain King, and a little switch flips in my head. I start wondering what life insurance must cost for swordbound dungeon-diving cave-crawlers. Is it really expensive? I mean, this is high-risk work. Well, "high-risk" might be an understatement for any job that can involve words like "lich" or "dragon" or "dracolich from Hell" in the description, but you know what I mean. Limbs fly off with alarming regularity. So I gotta figure their premiums are pretty high.

But then I realize that every dungeon party (every one without a death wish, anyway) has a healer of some sort. Be the source divine or alchemical, there's a Fix-'Er-Upper 9000 healbot latched onto the butt of the party. He's there to keep everyone alive. That's his only job. You have, in effect, a dedicated surgeon, poison control center, burn ward, dentist, and midwife available to you 24/7 and only a cry of "help" away. So adventurers tend to stay alive. Thus, low premiums.

That's when someone has to come along and shake the chair, lest I think about this so long I forget to get up and eat food.

-- Fox Barrett

October 6, 2008: Adventures Sure Are . . . Adventurous

You know, that Gripping Tales of the Impossible #1 sure has a lot of . . . positive qualities. Why, just the other day I was remarking to a colleague of mine that I found the . . . subject matter to be . . . particularly . . . of high-quality . . . -ness.

You're not buyin' this, are ya? Okay, okay, they pulled me in to write this piece at the last minute and I didn't have time to really read over the PDF. But I'm sure it's great, just the same! I mean, let's look at the sales text. Hmm. "Bizarre cultists." "Ancient city of Atlantis." "Love affair with Science and Technology." Well, everything certainly seems to be in order. Purchase the book forthwith or, um . . . ah . . .

Or be torn apart by bobcats! I . . . I guess.

-- Fox Barrett

October 5, 2008: Fiction Fraction

Usually, the things I'm banding about up here are games. Sometimes they're game stuff (a "game aid" if you will), but either way it's here with the intent to get you and friends to battle one another in the arena of the mind. Not this time!

No, strangely, I come to you with fiction in the form of a little PDF called Ave Molech Lore: Sharess & Talon. While familiarity with the setting helps, there's nothing to stop you just picking up the book and starting at page 1. Unless there's, say, a pack of magma-hounds between you and the computer.

In which case, how did you get past the magma-hounds to read this? Those are hounds! Made of magma!

-- Fox Barrett

October 4, 2008: But Monsieur, They're Only Wafer Thin!

Go ahead, help yourself to some Disposable Heroes. They're small, so take two. Heck, take three!

See, we've got Western Statix 2, we've got Pirate Statix 1, and over here there's even Fantasy 4E Statix Core Classes.

So go on, take a few. There's always room for paper minis, right?

-- Fox Barrett

October 3, 2008: I've Run Out Of Rocky Horror Jokes

GURPS Creatures of the Night, Vol. 4 is here and I've no more material to pull from the second greatest musical of all time. I . . . I'm not sure what to do! I'm cast adrift in a sea of uncertainty, clinging to the driftwood of self-doubt, waiting for the waves of inevitability to crash over me and sink me to the blank, inky depths.

Ooooo, that's kinda scary. It's . . . it's not really a joke, but it does fit with the horror theme of the book. Unless you people find my suffering amusing. Which would mean that it is a joke. Which means I did do my job. But I can't be happy about it, because that would remove the suffering, and with it the humor. Which would make it not funny. Which would make me sad, so it would be -

Y'know what? Nevermind. While it may not be as scary as what's jumping from one synapse to another in this toxic mass I call a brain, the book is scary and any horror game you're running will benefit from the tome's contribution. Go buy a copy.

-- Fox Barrett

October 2, 2008: Here's Looking At Useful

Of all the PDF stores in all the world, this book had to be sold in mine.

Okay, so you're thinking noir, you're thinking fedoras and femme fatales, you're thinking . . . exotic. So what comes to mind? If it's not Michael Curtiz's classic film, then get out. No, wait - come back! I haven't sold you a book yet!

Buy yourself a copy of Mean Streets Casablanca, you. Then go watch Casablanca. You'll thank me later.

-- Fox Barrett

October 1, 2008: Look Out! A Bear!

Here, beat it to death with this PDF! It's Do-Gooders & Daredevils: Mixed Heroes, a neat little collection of heroes, advice on building heroes, and other hero-y things!

. . . Yes, I realize this situation doesn't exactly make a whole lot of sense. Yeah, I guess it doesn't really have anything to do with the superhero theme. And no, this doesn't really tell you much about the . . . well . . . I, uh . . .

Look out! The bear is charging!

-- Fox Barrett

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