e23 News Archive: March 2009

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March 31, 2009: Actually, It Isn't All That Hard

The Lost Pyramid of Imhoptep? I don't know, you had it last!

Hah hah hah! Hah! Ah-hah . . . hah.

. . . wait, have I already used this joke? Man, this is really hard. I give up.

March 30, 2009: Well, Then Is It Really A Wasteland?

How "wasteland" must a wasteland be before its truly a wasteland. See, wastelands are wastelands because they're barren, right? And if they're barren, they can't support life, right? So I would think that if an area is, in fact, a wasteland, that this would preclude the living of any creatures therein.

And yet, here I am with a book called Creatures of the Wasteland. And, as it advertises, its filled to the edges with all manner of things that want to ruin your day out on the wastes. This only leaves two potential scenarios, then. One, that there are varying degrees of "wasteland" which I had previously not considered, some of which are capable of supporting some level of monstrous life.

And two, that I'm thinking far too hard about a monster book.

-- Fox Barrett

March 29, 2009: What's In A Name?

I was looking through Lands of Darkness #5: The Iron Mountains earlier, and when I got to the description of the titular mountain range, I was shocked by what I read! Shocked! For you see, there is in fact no iron at all left in the Iron Mountains! These should be the No More Iron Mountains. But no, the locals insist on using this incorrectly descriptive moniker.

Then I read the bits about all the stuff you could kill. Then the bits about all the cool stuff they drop.

Suddenly, I didn't care about the name anymore.

-- Fox Barrett

March 28, 2009: Supercops

Not every eye-laser-wielding paragon of justice need be a vigilante. Indeed, why be a much-maligned caped crusader when you can have the full backing of the law behind you? That way, when the newspapers can't decide if you're a "threat" or a "menace," you can show them that you're actually someone who will sue for libel.

Such is the world of Mutant City Blues. Robin D. Laws built a version of our little spinning ball of rock and water that had itself an unexpected event a few years back. A bunch of people got really sick, y'see. As it tends to happen with that sort of thing, some people came out on the other side of that sickness with superpowers. And some of those people, well, are very naughty, and probably shouldn't even be trusted with matches, let alone the ability to walk through walls. On the bright side, there's you. You have a badge. You have a gun.

And you can also walk through walls.

March 27, 2009: Mind Over What Matters

Having read GURPS Psionic Powers, I now know all, see all, and have some really neat tricks for parties. I shall demonstrate my powers of prognostication now! As I am writing this well before you read it, I shall simultaneously look into the future and read your mind to answer any and all questions you have about this new release. Behold!

. . . Yes . . . No . . . Yes . . . Page 12 . . . No . . . Both . . . Yes, technically, but no GM is that crazy . . . Only once, but I was pretty drunk at the time . . . And, it is done. Be amazed! Be bewildered! Be a proud owner of one very handy GURPS PDF, and you too shall wield the power supreme!*

* Insofar as you can reasonably consider an 85-page book full of handy GURPS info "power supreme," anyway. These things are relative, after all.

-- Fox Barrett

March 26, 2009: Hey! Lazy Bones!

Yeah, I'm talking to you. That sword of yours? Its not going to cut a swath on its own, buster. Spells? They don't cast themselves. What are you doing here when adventure awaits you? So come on, up with you and out with you!

No, no! No arguing. Here, take Master Dungeon Presents: Curse of the Kingspire and go find yourself a nice big monster to beat the snot out of. Trust me, sitting here at the computer all day is the surest way to get hit with level-drain damage.

Oh, and get a friend or two to go with. I'm sure they're not doing anything more important than your quest to seek fame, glory, and riches beyond all shiny-ness. Go! Shoo!

March 25, 2009: Yay, Computers!

I used to have a binder. In it, I kept all my campaign notes. Character sketches (literary, not doodles), location notes, maps, scenes, photocopied pages from whatever system was relevant, plot ideas, pages of all sizes and shapes shoved together and fused as one by three metal rings of metal. It held everything I needed to make worlds happen. It was charming, in its way, and a vital tool in my gaming career.

It was also a complete mess. Stuff was constantly falling out of it, it was totally frayed from being shoved into my backpack, and all things considered it's a wonder I ever found what I was looking for.

Now that I've put away childish things (and gotten my hands on a modest disposable income), I look to our friend The Computer to solve these organizational problems for me. NBOS Software released a little program not too long ago called The Keep, and that's exactly what it does. It keeps all our campaign junk in one place, and keeps it organized. Better still, you can try it for free for few days to see if its as helpful as I'm trying to convince you it is. So why continue to read my bizarre reminiscing? Go play with The Keep yourself!

-- Fox Barrett

March 24, 2009: Can't Have Too Many Guns

Oh, sure, Reality will try to argue that with you. It will say things like "this gun is functionally as good as that gun" or "you don't really need caseless ammunition" or "nobody makes that kind of bullet." And so on.

Well nuts to that, says I! And says Shooter's Guide: Alternate Arms. Variety is the spice of life, dagnabbit, and a variety of guns is certain spice things up.

. . . In fact, I guess that means guns are the spice of death.

March 23, 2009: Jabber, Jabber, Jabber

Pfft. Columnists. Oh, they're so great that what they think should be committed to the written word. Oh, they know all and see all and are so insightful. Bah! Bunch of hoighty-toity, self-absorbed, hot air if you ask me.  Why, if those columns were so great, they - What's that?

See Page XX is written by Robin Laws? Oh. Um.

Nevermind!

March 22, 2009: I Sprained My Jaw Trying

Advanced Adventures #8: The Seven Shrines of Nav'k-Qa. Go on. Try and pronounce that last word, there. I dare you. I'm pretty sure it's not possible if you possess only one measly human tongue. Truly, this beast of a word would require two tongues, working in tandem to assault at misshapen collection of letters from both sides.

On the other hand, you don't really have to know somethings name in order to kill it. (Not typically. I mean, sure, theres some spirits that would probably apply to, but . . . look, just play along.) You just need to know where it is and how big it is. And you only need to know how big so that you know just how large a sword to bring to stab the critter with. During the fight itself, just address it with stuff like "fiend" or "monster" or "hey, big ugly thing that I want to kill."

It's not like you have to worry about hurting its feelings. You're about to kill it.

-- Fox Barrett

March 21, 2009: Brought To You In Living . . . Wait, What?

Maybe color isn't always necessarily a good thing. Black and white films can help give the story that gritty, noir feeling. As a photographer, I know that black and white is great for generating high-contrast images, or for particularly stunning portraiture. Some comic books are done as black and white line art because, well, color ain't cheap and it ain't easy.

You, as a consumer on this website care about none of that, however. What you care about is your toner. And its a reasonable concern. Color is taxing on any printer, be it ink jet, laser, or dot matrix. (You're . . . you're not printing these books on a dot matrix printer . . . are you? You poor soul.) 0one recognizes that.  They know that not everyone has a Kinko's in their garage. So what are they doing about it?

There's a new line of maps from our good buddies at 0one called, appropriately enough, 0one Black & White. If you've tried any of their other map lines, you know that 0one PDFs are already pretty awesome. Now their awesome and optimized for a black and white printer. Good? No. Perfect. And if you don't believe me, you can see for yourself with this free sample over here.

-- Fox Barrett

March 20, 2009: Like Spooky Peanut-Butter & Clandestine Chocolate

Horror is good. Indeed, many of the most recent of these news posts have been about that very genre. The tension, the terror, the exploration of the human psyche. Also, the people getting impaled by giant monsters with spikes for arms.

Spies are great, too. They way they sneak around, steal things, sleep with exotic members of the opposite sex, shoot people, sleep with more people, blow up things, steal things that blow up things, sleep around some more, drink, blow up people that steal things, and sleep around a whole lot more. Plus, they get all the cool toys.

Horror and spies, though? That might just be too cool for me to handle! Lucky for you, you're not me. Go ye forth, then, and acquire Pyramid #3/5: Horror & Spies.

March 19, 2009: These Things Always Come In Threes

Hey! Horror fans! I ain't done with you yet! No, I've still got one more Pelgrane offering for those of you out there that prefer your nights to bump-filled. If I couldn't get you with a fresh take on horror roleplaying and I couldn't get you with classic sensibilities . . . then how about guns?

Lots of guns?

Okay, so take Tom Clancy. Then take Lovecraft. Now perform some profane ritual in the dead of night to fuse the two spirits into one. Sure, it'll look kinda gross and you'll never get the blood out of the carpet, but what you'll get is the sort of mind that would birth a game like The Esoterrorists. Imagine, if you will, a global conspiracy of occult horrors who's only goal is, essentially, to break everyone's stuff and generally make a mess of things. So who deals with these clowns? Another (albeit nicer) global conspiracy. One that upholds truth, justice, and the "we hate evil monsters, so lets waste the nasty little buggers" way. That's Esoterrorists. (And that weird Clancy/Lovecraft gestalt? That'd actually be Robin Laws. Neat, huh?)

March 18, 2009: Then Again . . .

Okay, so despite what I said yesterday, one must keep in mind that The Big Green Dude Himself is a classic for a reason. Maybe the Mythos is perfect for you and your group. And that's fine! But maybe you're open to news ways of running that Mythos-fueled nightmare?

Then you, friend, need to get on the Trail of Cthulhu. "What's that?" Why, it's nothing less than the single most bestest game of 1930s investigative horror that's ever been written, that's what. It runs on GUMSHOE, and is built to service both the purist mindset (or "Aiyeeeeee!") and the pulp mindset (or "Aiyeeeeeee! Shoot it!").

Oh, also some dude named Kenneth Hite worked on it. I think he might have worked with that Laws guy? They both sound familiar, but for some reason I can't quite place my finger on it . . . Where the heck have I heard those two names before . . .

-- Fox Barrett

March 17, 2009: It Needn't Always Be The Big Green Guy

In keeping with the theme I established yesterday, horror needn't always be the "known unknown." You can have your pants-on-head insanity without having to fall back on Lovecraft. Fall back, instead, on this other guy named Robin Laws.

He's wrote this book, y'see. Called it Fear Itself. It's a horror game that has all the old familiar feelings your looking for, but serves them up on a different plate. The scary bits in the game come less from slavering monsters and more from the carefully exploited personal fears of the characters. Not that there aren't slavering monsters to rip your characters apart. Far from it. They're just subtler than most.

Right up until the point where they rip off your arm and shove it through your chest, anyway. Because, like any good horror, you're not trying to defeat it. You're trying to survive it.

-- Fox Barrett

March 16, 2009: Stop Getting Cozy With The Abomidable Horror!

Vampires and werewolves and bears, oh . . . oh, who cares? It's been done! Ho-hum! Yawn, even! What is there to be scared of when everything scary has come, gone, and left you with the T-shirt? Where lurks terror when terror faces only the steadfast (and, frankly, bored) countenance of the seasoned adventurers? Is there nothing left to be afraid of any more?

It would seem that way. Until you notice The Book of Unremitting Horror. Available in both GUMESHOE and d20 flavors, this book is 200+ pages of spooks from the deepest bowels of your darkest nightmares.

Me? I'd read it with all the lights on.

-- Fox Barrett

March 15, 2009: 'Cause That's All Yer Worth, Kid

Level 1, eh? Yeah, I remember when I was level 1. Fending off kobolds. Worrying about pit traps. Yup . . . I remember those old days well . . . because I was pathetic! But not now. No, sir. Now I've got me a magic sword that kills dragons and enough AC to ignore your attacks in my sleep.

But, I suppose there's hope for you, if you get some XP into those stringy arms of yours. Here, take Dungeon Crawl Classics: Mists of Madness. It's only two bucks, which I'm sure even a scrappy young dungeon-hopeful like yourself can afford. And if you can't, just sell that stupid spare dagger you bought. Really, you're never going to use it. If someone manages to get that pointy sliver you call a "sword" away from you, you're pretty much hosed anyway.

Unless you keep in mind the first rule of dungeon crawling: stand behind your friends.

-- Fox Barrett

March 14, 2009: Get Blitzed!

Heavy Gear! We've got Heavy Gear! We've got big robot smashy desert pow crash pew-pew-pew!

So, I'm a little excited. As someone who came to the hobby though BattleTech, I've always had a special place in my heart for people in big robots beating the ever-loving tar out of one another on my gaming table. Finally being able to offer the ever-awesome Heavy Gear, then, has me riding a huge nerd-high right now. In the coming days we'll have some of the older roleplaying stuff up, but at the moment lets start with my favorite part: miniatures!

Heavy Gear Blitz! is, for those of you uninitiated, a wargame about a planet called Terra Nova. Now, on this planet are two groups of people who've had the courtesy to divide themselves into an easily understandable North and South dichotomy. The Northerners (not being particularly partial to those from the South) and the Southerners (themselves not especially enamored with those up North) have decided to resolve their issues like any rational person would. They all get together in giant robots and blow one another to kingdom-come in a big desert along the planet's equator. In other words, it's everything you could ever possibly want from anything. Ever.

-- Fox Barrett

March 13, 2009: Trains Are Scary!

Well, they are! Have you ever stared one down? No? Well, if you want to know fear, stand on a train track some time and try to stare a train down. Guarantee that'll raise the old blood pressure a few notches.

Now that we're all in the correct mindset, I can drag GURPS Locations: Metro of Madness in front of you. This somewhat generic and reasonably universal location can be plugged into any cityscape you'd like to be just a little bit creepier. It's a haunted subway station! Or perhaps a mystical subway station. Or maybe it's just Illuminated. Or . . .

Whatever you decide this place is, spooky will be involved somehow. This ain't the "Metro of Happy Fluffykins, The Gift-Giving Rabbit" after all.

-- Fox Barrett

March 12, 2009: Fee, Fi, Fo, Fun

If you're cruising around on this website (and I'm pretty sure you are, since you're reading this), you're probably not the sort of person who turns up their nose at fairy tales. More than likely, you're one of those people that knows how cool most fairy tales actually are. And I think it's a safe bet to assume that some of you have even run fairy tale inspired games at one time or another.

You know that fairy tales aren't for children. They're for adults. To terrify children with. So why don't you have any neat miniatures for some of the favorites?

Why not indeed. You can find some, though, over here in a little set of digital miniatures called Paper Miniatures: Nursery Tales Set.

-- Fox Barrett

March 11, 2009: More Free Stuff? Why Sure!

How do they do it? How does Skirmisher keep offering all this great stuff for the asking? I can't come up with a "how," but I do know "why" they want you to have the Giants and Wizards expansions for Little Orc Wars.

Why? Because they love you.

Seriously. They do. They won't stop talking about you. In fact, it's starting to get a little annoying. Won't you people please return Skirmisher's call?

-- Fox Barrett

March 10, 2009: Oh, For Art's Sake!

"Vintage" is a good word. Got a nice sound to it. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, it means "Characterized by excellence, maturity, and enduring appeal; classic."

Oh . . . uh, it also says "Old or outmoded." Um . . . moving along.

Vintage Clipart! It has excellence, maturity, and enduring appeal. A classic product.

-- Fox Barrett

March 9, 2009: Like Knights, But More Gun-Y

Whereas darn near every other country out there has some kind of medieval, knights and kings, fantasy-genre-applicable past that they can go back to, we of these States United have no such era. The closest we ever came was that period between the 1800s and 1900s where men were men, women were women, and shooting people was a national pastime. All things considered . . . I think we came out ahead in that cosmic deal.

Which is why I'm always happy to see products like Frontier Towns: Fort Griffin Trilogy. Here's a rootin'-tootin', rip-roarin', and other-such-nonsense-wordsin' frontier town all laid out for you. Just add cowboys, shake, and let go. It's loaded with stats for Sidewinder: Recoiled, but you can side-step those if you're just looking for a thoroughly fleshed-out Old West town that you can drop into just about any campaign.

(I say "just about" because it would be a little tricky to drop it into 1800's France. But you could certainly try!)

March 8, 2009: Hangin' With Mr. Cooper's Critters

Okay, so the age of d20 has come and gone. We've all moved on to the New and the Shiny, leaving our ancient and tattered ways behind.

So obviously we wouldn't have any need for the like of the Cooper's Compendium series. Its updated, revised, and just-plain-fixed entries for darn near every critter in the SRD is no use to you. You'll never need to field these balanced and corrected beasties in an exciting life-or-death struggle of twenty-sided proportion. Nope.

. . . And if anyone out there buys that line, I've got this great ocean-front property to sell you in Arizona.

March 7, 2009: Would You Like To Stab More People?

Sure, we all do!

But if you're like me, you're incredibly lazy. You like the idea of running a game, but it's just so darned much work. So do what I do: cheat. Buy a canned adventure!

"Like what?" Like The Road to Revolution: Tides of Blood! "Revolution," "blood," "road." Clearly, it has everything you need for a good adventure. And no messy thinkin' required. Truly, life is beautiful.

March 6, 2009: Fun, But Also Educational

Ohio. It may not be the first thing that comes to mind when talking about war, adventure, or mystery. It might not be the second thing. Or third. Or even the 27th. But don't count Ohio out just yet! It's got history, y'know.

History that is a key part of Colonial Gothic: The Defeated Dead. See, there was this famous battle - well, massacre really - in what's now part of western Ohio. Whole bunch of militia fellows got a whole lot of dead because there were a whole lot more natives than there were guns to fight them with. Now, Colonial Gothic being the sort of setting it is, you can probably imagine what's going to happen when someone tries to rebuild the site three years after some 600+ people died there.

See? Ohio is exciting!

March 5, 2009: Smorgasbord!

What a great word. It's one of those words that's considerate enough to sound exactly like what it represents. And a smorgasbord is exactly what we have this week.

Yesterday was GM's Day, a day when The Game Master comes down to Earth and gives all the good gamers . . . okay, I'm now being told that this isn't the case. Apparently, it's a day we're supposed to give thanks to our GM's by purchasing something nice and gamery for them. Like, say, one of the 12 GURPS books we released yesterday. All were part of the GURPS Classics line, which means they're all nice and affordable. Perfect gifts for the GURPS GM in your life.

But really, though, what kind of crazy holiday doesn't either involve jolly fat men, anthropomorphic bunnies, or dressing up in ridiculous clothing? Ah well, I'm sure your GM won't mind.

-- Fox Barrett

March 4, 2009: Released March 3, 2009

March 3, 2009: Free Game! (Like Beer!)

Lookit, lookit! A free game! I love these. Not just because they're free. No sir. It's also because I don't have to spend a bunch of time trying to convince you to buy them. It's free! What have you got to lose?

This free little gem is called PowerLunch. It's a CCG that you play with business cards. I'm going to write that again. It's a CCG you play with business cards.

Sometimes, when something like this comes along, I remember just how much I love working in this industry.

March 2, 2009: Build Rome In A Day

Okay, maybe not Rome. This is actually probably better for building Florence or something. But the point still stands! And that point is thus:

I have here some books. You, the Master of Games, have a lot to do and not a lot of time to do it in. These books are part of the City Builder line. As the Master, you're sure to need a city or two. And building them sure is time consuming. So if you're looking to flesh out a fantasy (or just otherwise medievally) city in, oh, about a day . . . catch the drift I'm sending?

"That's all well and good," you're thinking, "but what system is this for?" Well that's the beauty part. This stuff is system neutral. So grab your six-siders or your twenty-siders or your "my Archery skill is Slightly Above Average"-siders and get to building!

-- Fox Barrett

March 1, 2009: So It's Not Just A Clever Name

Looking for some wargames? Because we've got this company called Skirmisher selling PDFs through our website and, wouldn't you know it, they've got a few.

There's Chevauchee, for starters. It's about that time when England and France were kind of upset with one another for a very, very, very long time.  There's also Stevenson at Play, which was written by some guy named Robert Louis Stevenson. Whoever that is. And finally, there's the surprisingly appropriately named Skirmish! A game called Skirmish! from Skirmisher Publishing? Does wargaming get any more straight forward than that? Is it even possible?

I submit that it is not.

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